i have invested a lifetime in writing the perfect character. without question, i made sure it was a Thing everyone could hate. this villein was real. i could feel it breathing life into my passionate utterances against the state, the institution, the americas, the slave. it was my failed relationships, my failed accomplishments, she was everything i promised myself i could live without. this monster was so real that i began to write her into the lives of those close to me––taking over like grey goo. the comedy of it all is that the villein is really something in ourselves. a psychological trick, a scapegoat, an excuse to hold everyone else accountable. the monster was/is incorporated.
"the study of what "is written" is also the science of what story we are compelled to invent in the face of what we cannot know is coming." –alexis pauline gumbs